Author: darkhavens
Title: A United Front 1/1
Pairing: Rodney McKay/John Sheppard (and a hint of Jack/Daniel)
Fandom: Stargate Atlantis
Prompt: #024 Choices in my slash_100 Big Damn McShep Table
Rating: R
Words: 1446
Spoilers: None
Feedback/Concrit: darkhavens @ slashverse.com
Disclaimer: Not mine, never will be. No harm, no foul, no money made.
Summary: A few years into the future, a promotion and a new Equality Bill. But no Ferrari.
Notes: Written for a_phoenixdragon.


A United Front

Rodney turned on his heel at the corner of the hotel bed and paced - one, two, three, four, five, six, seven steps - back towards the door and then turn and back he went again, for the hundredth time. Or at least that's how it seemed to John.

"Dammit, you know as well as I do that this whole new 'gay-friendly' act is a front, and not even a particularly clever one at that."

Rodney reached the corner of the bed, pausing just long enough for John to get his hopes up before turning once again to resume his pacing. "Oh, I'm sure it's fine for your average future grunt to wear a Gay Pride shirt to the recruitment office, but for long time officers to step out of the military closet it's another thing entirely, and don't you dare try and tell me otherwise."

There was blessed silence as he completed two more lengths of the room, and then he thrust out a finger and waggled it threateningly in John's direction. "I won't let you torpedo your career just so you can rub their bigoted noses in the fact that the CO of Atlantis is queer!"

Okay, that was further than John was willing to let him go.

"Hey!"

Rodney turned mid-pace and dropped heavily onto the foot of the bed, almost bouncing John off onto the floor. John rode out the turbulence and then tilted sideways until his shoulder connected with Rodney's.

"Hey." This time John didn't shout, but the tone of his voice captured Rodney's attention.

With a sigh, Rodney twisted slightly to rest his forehead on John's shoulder.

"I- I'm sorry, but I can't bite my tongue all evening while a bunch of military assholes act like you're a disgrace to the uniform for enjoying cock. By the end of the night you'd either be on your way to Leavenworth under guard or facing dishonorable discharge, and I'd be in a sub-sub-sub-sub-basement somewhere way beyond top secret, and this time they'd never let me out."

"Huh." Jon looked thoughtful. "So, this is all about you protecting my honor?"

John bumped his elbow into Rodney's ribs as he twisted around and beneath him, lowering them both to lie crookedly across the unmade bed.

"Rodney McKay," he whined nasally, "you're my hero."

Rodney hummed and squirmed about until he was comfortably straddling one of John's thighs.

"Yes, well, I might have guessed you'd be a fan of that movie. I bet you nearly swallowed your tongue when they trashed the car."

John blinked innocently. He was admitting nothing.

"You wanted to be the parking garage attendant, didn't you? Forget dining like kings or getting the girl or singing in the parade - you wanted to be the guy putting all those miles on the clock."

A slow bump and grind of hips had John not caring just how well Rodney seemed to read his every thought.

"If you manage to get through tomorrow night's dinner without outing us, I'll buy you a Ferrari."

Sliding his hands down Rodney's back to cup his ass, John lifted his head to steal a fast, sloppy kiss.

"Do you have any idea how long the waiting list is for a Ferrari?"

Fingers busy with the buttons of John's shirt, Rodney shrugged. "I don't-"

"Two years. Two years, Rodney. We're only here for a couple of weeks and then who knows when we'll next be Earthside. It's a sweet idea, but…"

Rodney huffed indignantly and let go of John's half unbuttoned shirt, planting his hands in the mattress beside John's hips to lever himself up to gain a better, more imperious angle for his glare.

"You don't think I can get you a Ferrari by tomorrow night?"

The new position brought their groins into even closer contact, and John groaned, his fingers curling tighter around Rodney's ass.

"It's not that, I…"

John could see the prospect of immediate sexual gratification fading in the face of a full-on Rodney McKay snit, so he changed tactics, turning on his most seductive pout.

"I'd rather you were sitting beside me at dinner and not off waving obscene amounts of money under a stranger's nose."

"You just don't think I can-"

"Rodney, I don't need a Ferrari. What I need is to have you sitting beside me, keeping me entertained through all those long, boring speeches and unfunny jokes."

Rodney still didn't look convinced. John sighed.

"I'm not chewing my way through government issue rubber chicken without you, Rodney. If you're not coming with me, I'm not going."

"You - you can't be serious. This is your career, John. This is Atlantis, the Pegasus galaxy, the SGC, the President. You can't risk all that for-"

"For you? Oddly enough it stopped being about you around the fourth time I had to explain that yes, I knew the seating arrangements weren't designed to seat old team mates together and that I wanted you sitting beside me for purely personal reasons."

The solid feel of Rodney's weight pressing down on him kept John grounded, muting the re-emergence of the fury he had felt at being transferred from phone to phone for three solid hours.

"Every time I said you were my partner I got transferred to someone else who'd ask me the same damn questions all over again. One jackass even asked me if I realised the President would be there, like Hayes had signed the True Equality Bill into law without bothering to read it first."

Rodney snorted and lowered himself back down so that his nose was barely an inch away from John's.

"And the more they gave you the run-around, the more determined you were to have me sitting by your side like a good little trophy wife."

Rodney ignored John's stunned - horrified - expression.

"How did you finally get the monkeys in charge to take you seriously?"

"I called General O'Neill."

Rodney's eyebrows headed north.

"And he helped?"

"Once he stopped laughing, sure. Now he's got us sitting at one of the top tables, with him and Dr Jackson - a united front, I think he said. A crazy General and a full bird Colonel, each with their own trained-to-kill pet scientist. His words," he added at the incensed look on Rodney's face. "I think he's looking forward to causing some trouble. They don't let him out to play too often anymore."

Transferring his weight to one hand, Rodney began to unbutton them both from neck to groin with absent efficiency.

"So, you're really not putting your continued presence in Atlantis at risk for me?"

"Uh… No?"

The fingers in close proximity to his rapidly hardening cock had John a little off-balance, but he was fairly sure that that was the correct answer and not one likely to leave him once again hanging in the wind.

Rodney's soft sigh told him he'd got it right.

"Thank God for that."

John's relief at ending the discussion was abruptly curtailed.

"But you know I'd come up with a way to get you back to Atlantis even if they fired your skinny, full bird ass, don't you, Colonel? I know more about the gadgets at Area 51 than I did when I worked there, and I know they haven't changed the security system at all since I left, so, if I had to, I could probably rig us personal cloaking devices and get us back under the mountain without tripping an alarm. And, of course, I brought along the portable DHD I had to put together for MPX-523 last year, so we'd have a way of dialling home without having to take the control room too."

John blinked, slightly stunned.

"Just how many contingency plans do you have in place? Is Radek going to stage a coup if we don't get home on time?"

The shifty expression on Rodney's face answered for him.

"You… No, there's no way Radek would ever go up against Elizabeth to take control of the city, not even for you."

A smug little smile twitched the corner of Rodney's mouth.

"Who says Elizabeth isn't in on the plan? She learned the lesson well, John, we all did - leave no man behind. Not going home isn't an option."

The final button gave beneath Rodney's questing fingers and suddenly they were skin to skin and hungry for more. The conversation was dropped in favour of getting naked - clothes peeled away and tossed in a familiar routine, choreographed through years of easy cooperation.

As John readied himself to slide home he leaned forward and whispered in Rodney's ear.

"You were kidding about the coup though, right?"

Rodney grinned.