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23 November 2005 @ 01:36 am
'Strange Dinners', two for open_on_sunday challenge #139 - Strange Dinners
Author: darkhavens
Title: Strange Dinners
Pairing: Spike/Xander
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: Not mine, never will be. No harm, no foul, no money made.
Summary: A look at early baby!vamp!Xander and more recent meal.

Etiquette Lessons

"I want the little redhead in the corner - she looks like Willow. I want the maitre d', he smells like cardamom and chilli." The expression on Spike's face made him sigh. "But… I'll have the shrimp cocktail, followed by the steak tartare, an extra side of fries and some onion rings. Ooh, imported beer! Make mine a Heineken. And for dessert, a…"

"That's enough, luv. If you can eat all of that without vamping out once, I'll let you have the redhead for dessert. Deal?"

Xander's gameface flickered and was gone. "I can do that! Well, probably…"

"You'll learn, luv."

A Home-Cooked Meal

"Xan, luv, what are you doing?"

"I made you dinner!"

Spike studied the tableau from the doorway.

"I see that."

The man, long and dark, a lot like Xander and Angelus, lay motionless upon a tarp upon the dining table. Naked, he was decorated here and there with sprigs of herbs; little bowls of crudités and chips were scattered round.

"He still alive?"

Xander nodded eagerly.

"Yup. I broke his neck as soon as I got him stripped and on the table. I think he was expecting kinky sex."

Xander held out a cutthroat razor.

"Do you want to carve?"

tabaquitabaqui on November 23rd, 2005 01:58 am (UTC)
OH you are a freak!!
*beams at you*

Luffs you!!
darkhavens: sx a love eternal [literati]darkhavens on November 24th, 2005 09:33 pm (UTC)
Heeeee! Thanks! *smooch*
most excellently twisted: Perv Flagfanbot on November 23rd, 2005 03:03 am (UTC)
I adore you.
darkhavens: b!v!x [literati]darkhavens on November 24th, 2005 09:33 pm (UTC)

Thanks! :D
Lalkhamsin-khamsolal: literati -OTPpiratepurple on November 23rd, 2005 03:18 am (UTC)
You are so sick, but in that really excellent way that warms the cockles of my heart. That last line made me choke. :)
darkhavens: sx a love eternal [literati]darkhavens on November 24th, 2005 09:34 pm (UTC)
Hee! Thank you!
*continues to warm your cockles* ;)
Sandra aka ghostnut aka molossus aka rooibasmyfeetshowit on November 23rd, 2005 03:41 am (UTC)
Okay - I see the Thanksgiving here. I'm giving Thanks that I don't meet up with Spike and baby Xander! Still enjoy reading about them though!
darkhavens: b!v!x [literati]darkhavens on November 24th, 2005 09:34 pm (UTC)
Thanks! *g*

They're great fun to watch from a distance. ;)
woman_of_: Lovely boys spanderwoman_of_ on November 23rd, 2005 03:57 am (UTC)
These are really mouthwateringly good. They are both just such fun and the two of them are so cute
darkhavens: sx a love eternal [literati]darkhavens on November 24th, 2005 09:35 pm (UTC)
Thank you. :D

They're amazing fun to write. I can get cute and cadavers into the same drabble - always a joy. *g*
rayne_y_dazerayne_y_daze on November 23rd, 2005 04:10 am (UTC)
I love the table manners training :-) But this...Do you want to carve? That's why I'm so hooked on your stuff! *shiver*
darkhavens: b!v!x [literati]darkhavens on November 24th, 2005 09:37 pm (UTC)
Thanks! I'm hooked on writing these two. ;)
tistootistoo on November 23rd, 2005 06:26 am (UTC)

I don't comment anywhere NEAR enough on these drabbles you write with such hedonistic glee, and that's my own failing.

I absolutely love these and the last one... 'Do you want to carve?'...?


Made me smile, and... wait. Does that make me sick?

Um, I was picturing my exec. chef as the one on the table... and giggling.

*chuckles* Okay, I'm sick.

LOVE this 'verse! Always a treat! *pets you*


darkhavens: sx a love eternal [literati]darkhavens on November 24th, 2005 09:39 pm (UTC)

'Hedonistic glee' describes it perfectly - Spike and Xander both have so much range, from gore to glee, from cute to downright cruel. Fun! :D
outsideth3box: Vamp!Xanderoutsideth3box on November 23rd, 2005 03:00 pm (UTC)
I have been really really bad about commenting lately. RL has been doing its best to stomp me.

But please know that I still utterly adore baby!vamp!Xander and his wonderful Sire.

If it weren't a very fatal idea I would huggle them to pieces. These were especially sweet.
darkhavens: b!v!x [literati]darkhavens on November 24th, 2005 09:40 pm (UTC)
RL can be a bitca. I'm glad to see you aren't letting it beat you. *smooch*

Thanks! :D
wolfmamawolfmama on November 23rd, 2005 06:51 pm (UTC)
Graveyard humor freak, LMAO...You bet he wants to carve..It's Thanksgiving ya know:) Hahahahahahahahahaha..Vamp Turkey!!!!!!!!!!!!
darkhavens: sx a love eternal [literati]darkhavens on November 24th, 2005 09:43 pm (UTC)
Thankee! My sense of humour has always been warped (I blame Mommie Dearest - she passed hers down to me), and the baby!vamp!Xander drabbles give me so many opportunities to exercise it, sometimes I'm spoiled for choice. *g*
     Mandya_phoenixdragon on November 23rd, 2005 09:03 pm (UTC)
Guhhh... I mean - GUHHHH...

Baby!Vamp!Xnader is too awesome! Eyes bigger than tummy much?! *G*!
darkhavens: b!v!x [literati]darkhavens on November 24th, 2005 09:44 pm (UTC)
Thanks! :D

Xander's still a growing boy vamp. He has quite an eppetite. ;)
uihuih on November 23rd, 2005 10:43 pm (UTC)
"Do you want to carve?"
How nice to make Spike dinner,but Xander needs some cooking lessons. I really like this small stories...

darkhavens: sx a love eternal [literati]darkhavens on November 24th, 2005 09:45 pm (UTC)

I think Xander's cooking skills are limited to poptarts and microwave meals, but he tries. ;)
Nicoleblue_icy_rose on November 25th, 2005 04:41 am (UTC)
*wishes she had her "You are seriously disturbed and I love that about you" icon*

Seriously. That last line...it kills me because it's so sweet that he made Spike dinner and twisted at the same time because well, it is a person. I just love baby!vamp!Xander. Hee.

Another great set.
darkhavens: deeply disturbed [secondverse]darkhavens on November 25th, 2005 06:36 am (UTC)
Hee! Thanks! Sweet and twisted are just two of baby!vamp!Xander's more adorable traits. *g*

And as a personal favour to you, I use my (ie yin_again's )version of the "You are seriously disturbed and I love that about you" icon. :D
Nicoleblue_icy_rose on November 25th, 2005 06:51 am (UTC)
Ha...what do you know? That's the exact one I have! (For some reason...deeply and seriously got completely switched in my head.)

I'm thinking I should upload that one again soon for moments and drabbles like this. Hee!
darkhavens: chaos panic disorder [secondverse]darkhavens on November 25th, 2005 06:53 am (UTC)
Then I shall do my best to see that it gets a regular outing. ;)
saifai on November 27th, 2005 06:48 am (UTC)
::giggles:: Aww, they do Thanksgiving too. LOL
batmanvinniebatmanvinnie on November 28th, 2005 03:52 am (UTC)
Very good. I love vampXan, he's soooo cute, in a psycho killer way. But still cute.