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darkhavens
02 July 2004 @ 05:09 am
Grungefic part 2

Okay, so posting part one obviously kicked something loose because Dru started talking to me while I was in the kitchen making hot chocolate (banana flavoured, yum!) and this is what happened. It's completely unbeta'd so if you see any errors, let me know so I can ignore correct them. Thank you!

(Previous part[s] can be found here.)

...

Dru knows they’re coming long before they arrive, and has her dolls all lined up for a tea party, waiting to greet their guest. She’s clapping in delight even before the door is completely open.

“Have you brought me a present, my Spike? A pretty dolly to scream for me until the whispers stop? Is that why you’ve been gone so long?”

She slides from the bed, all lace and silk, and runs towards them, eager to claim her gift, then stops. Frowns. Approaches more cautiously, a puzzled expression on her pretty face.

“Oh, my Spike, you’ve caught yourself a very special kitten. He’s not for me at all, though his pain sings to me so prettily, my sweet boy. I smell innocence and grief and guilt and… Oh! Spike! I can smell Daddy!” Fingers hooked like claws reach out and grasp at Xander’s arm. “I smell Daddy on you, Kitten. Did he send you here, a present for his bestest boy and girl?”

And Xander cannot answer because he doesn’t understand a single thing she’s said so far, except the bit about the grief and guilt… and pain? But Spike is reaching out and prying her cold fingers from his arm, and drawing her away, back to the bed. He settles her in and rearranges the pillows and the dolls, and Xander can tell this is a regular thing.

This evil, soulless demon that has taken control of his life, such as it is, obviously cares a great deal for the strange, exotic beauty he is catering to. Xander knows that she is damaged somehow, almost childlike; though he doubts her ability to kill is much impaired. And he wonders again what Jesse had felt when the stake slid through his flesh. Did he have time to think, to regret that it was Xander who was responsible for taking his life? Had his, their, life flashed before his eyes, or might that even have happened before, when he was turned? If he had survived the accidental staking, could he have shown the care and love this unfamiliar monster now displays?

“Your kitten’s tearing tiny little holes into his soul, my Spike. I see them, full of dirty dark brown poison and they weep the purest blood-red rage and fury. He’s a strong one, is your kitten, but he doesn’t know his fate has been rewritten. Someone moved the picture, changed the clocks and made the moon go black. His coming here has altered all the truths I’ve seen so now I must see more.”

Dru pulls Spike down and kisses him quite delicately, then snuggles down into the heaps of comforters and pillows. “Your kitten’s hurting, Spike. So purple-pretty and so raw. I think you need to go and help him grieve and ease his guilt and let him bleed a little, just to let him know he’s still alive. But not too much or else he’ll leave us, and my Spike, that just won’t do. I could smell Daddy on him, so he’s special, just for us, so keep him safe and keep him close and make him ours, not hers no more.”

Xander hears her whisper, knows it’s likely about him but cannot find it in himself to give a damn. He’s taken all these possibilities away from Jesse, not on purpose, true, but in the end his friend still turned to dust and he was told that that was best for all concerned. How do they know? How could they know? They didn’t see his eyes, or hear his words before he died that second time. They just assume that demon equals bad; that vampires only want to kill or turn. And yet he’s here, right now, with two of them, and he’s feeling pretty confident that they don’t mean him harm, or not the lethal kind at least, although the thought of even that won’t make him turn and run in fear.

His memories of Jesse are interrupted by a cool hand taking his, and he looks up into eyes of purest blue that seem to burn a hole right through him to his soul.

“My princess needs her sleep, it’s almost dawn, so let’s adjourn this pity party for the night, okay with you, Pet?” And he’s led, unresisting, out of the bedroom down the hall into another room, not quite as large, but just as dominated by the black silk sheeted double bed and crimson drapes that stretch from floor to ceiling.

“I’m feeling pretty tired myself, so let’s just get you comfy, yeah, and then we’ll get some sleep and talk some more when evening comes.” And nimble fingers strip away his shirt and boots and socks and jeans. They linger on the waistband of his shorts before withdrawing with reluctance, which amuses, for a moment, till the apathy returns.

He’s pushed back on the bed and nudged and turned and just allows the vampire, Spike, to rearrange him as he wants before the blue-eyed blond slides in between the covers, right up next to him, and wraps his arms and legs around him tight.

“I could get used to cuddling up to you at night like this, so warm and cosy. You won’t try and leave us while I sleep, now will you, pretty? Won’t try to sneak out in the sunlight when you know that we can’t follow? You’d best not try it, pretty, cos I’d hate to have to hurt you but I would. You’re mine now, mine to keep and care for, hurt or harm. And you know it, deep inside you, where the pain is sharp as knives. So sleep now, and I’ll chase away the nightmares that won’t leave while you’re awake.”

And Xander sleeps, entangled in the limbs of something he’d been told to hate. And he sleeps well.
 
 
feeling: creativecreative
hearing: nothing but the clicking of the keyboard
 
Ameamejisuto on July 2nd, 2004 04:31 am (UTC)
::pets Xander:: Spike and Dru are gonna make it all better for him, how wonderful!! Really liking this, can't wait for more!
darkhavensdarkhavens on July 2nd, 2004 04:42 am (UTC)
Thanks. Glad you're enjoying. It's a wild ride on this end of things. I have no idea half the time what's about to fall off the end of my fingers. I have to keep watching the screen to see what's being typed. o.O
who said what now? - amejisuto on July 2nd, 2004 04:58 am (UTC) (Expand)
who said what now? - darkhavens on July 2nd, 2004 05:06 am (UTC) (Expand)
Kristintxrabbit on July 2nd, 2004 07:39 am (UTC)
Wow, what a lovely Dru voice. She is so hard to write, but I could actually see her. Wow.

Nice forward progress! Xander slept well. Can't wait to see what happens next.
darkhavensdarkhavens on July 2nd, 2004 01:16 pm (UTC)
I could actually see her. Wow.

Wow, indeed. Thank you so much!

What happens next? Xander wakes up in bed with a demon, of course... Hee!
tabaquitabaqui on July 2nd, 2004 05:01 pm (UTC)
Wow.
Yeah, okay.
I like him questioning everything he's been told.
That is...so cool.
:)
*bounce*
And Dru!
Whoot!
Can't wait for more!
darkhavensdarkhavens on July 3rd, 2004 12:25 am (UTC)
Xander has curiosity to spare. ;o)

And Dru, yeah, I was practically channeling Dru last night. Scary stuff! ;o)

There is more on the way. Later tonight if the muse co-operates. Which she may not, because I forgot to buy chocolate. I wonder if she'd accept donuts?
who said what now? - tabaqui on July 3rd, 2004 12:53 am (UTC) (Expand)
who said what now? - darkhavens on July 3rd, 2004 01:44 am (UTC) (Expand)
who said what now? - tabaqui on July 3rd, 2004 02:54 am (UTC) (Expand)
willshenilshe on July 2nd, 2004 06:27 pm (UTC)
Absolutely wonderful. I love your Dru-voice in this. My computer's broken and I'm all pissed, or I'd be a lot more enthusiastic, but trust me - really enjoyed this. Can't wait to see what comes next. :-)
darkhavensdarkhavens on July 3rd, 2004 12:30 am (UTC)
Dru was in fine form last night. I just listened and copie down what she told me. ;o)

Broken computer is my greatest fear. I hope you get it fixed soon, and not only for the lovely fb. Hee!

The third part is... under construction. I've had a crappy day at work and I need to get the proper headspace back.
your royal pie-nessentrenous88 on July 2nd, 2004 08:58 pm (UTC)
Really good so far. I like that they didn't have sex in moment one, that Spike isn't tame, though he can obviously care for Dru, and that Xander is driven more by apathy than a sudden and unwarranted enthusiasm for the undead. In other words, this is all gradual development, and you're building things up well. Looking forward to reading more.
darkhavensdarkhavens on July 3rd, 2004 12:51 am (UTC)
Thank you. :o)

Xander's too full of grief and guilt to experience a sudden anything. But the shell is cracking...
kaydee23kaydee23 on July 3rd, 2004 12:49 am (UTC)
More more more more!
darkhavensdarkhavens on July 3rd, 2004 12:53 am (UTC)
More on the way perty soon. ;o)
Blood Roses: Never Seen Bluebloodroses27 on July 4th, 2004 05:53 am (UTC)
Ooo! What a lovely little fic! I truly believe you had Dru in your head, her voice was perfect. Besides, she can't visit the BtVS writers anymore, so why not flitter out to the fanfic authors? She has to go somewhere. ;)

I can't wait for more.
darkhavensdarkhavens on July 4th, 2004 08:37 pm (UTC)
Well, she's always welcome here. ;o)

Thank you for the fb. There should be more soon.
kitty_poker1kitty_poker1 on July 4th, 2004 11:01 am (UTC)
So good! Dru's voice is excellent and I loved Spike holding off from getting down to business. Even refraining from removing Xander's boxers!

I suspect, somehow, that Xander won't be trying to run away. He's slept well ... he's found a home?
darkhavensdarkhavens on July 4th, 2004 08:15 pm (UTC)
I said to tabaqui yesterday that I was pactically channeling Dru, which was pretty freaky. She just started rambling away in my head... o.O

I think Spike knows he's found something special, though right now it's only the Angel/Slayer connection. And Dru told him to keep Xander happy so he's going to play it cautiously. Or as cauriously as Spike ever plays anything... ;o)
who said what now? - kitty_poker1 on July 4th, 2004 09:08 pm (UTC) (Expand)
who said what now? - darkhavens on August 3rd, 2004 09:42 pm (UTC) (Expand)
who said what now? - kitty_poker1 on August 3rd, 2004 09:49 pm (UTC) (Expand)
who said what now? - darkhavens on August 4th, 2004 05:52 am (UTC) (Expand)
who said what now? - kitty_poker1 on August 4th, 2004 06:31 am (UTC) (Expand)
(Anonymous) on July 4th, 2004 05:15 pm (UTC)
WOWOWOWOW
MORE PLEASE!!!!!!!
Mia
darkhavensdarkhavens on July 4th, 2004 08:16 pm (UTC)
Re: WOWOWOWOW
Hee! So, you like?

There's more coming soonest, I promise. Thanks for fbing!
brujabroom on July 4th, 2004 07:18 pm (UTC)
It's official I'm as blind as a bat and an idiot to boot! why you ask? simple I completely missed this *shakes head in disbelief* my apologies for the late comment.

Well where to start, there is of course the wonderful way you manage to convey the despair and appathy that poor Xander is so wraped in, then there is Dru and the absolutely wonderful way you've written her, then Spike the true demon wanting Xander as his and taking him, taking care of him, promising to do what Xander needs.

I can't wait to see how this will develop.*g*

By the way I absolutely adore the look of your lj, its fantastic *g*
darkhavensdarkhavens on July 4th, 2004 08:32 pm (UTC)
Thank you for the lovely fb! (No need to apologise for being late. You did fb and that's what counts.)

I really believe that Xander should have been allowed to grieve and feel guilt in the show, but I never even considered writing anything like this until it started spilling onto the keyboard.

Everybody loves my Dru voice! Yay! I was slightly worried, because I haven't really written any Dru before, though I love the character. And Spike is just the way I like him: unchipped, unsouled, and plotting how to get into Xander's knickers. ;o)

The face on my journal is by Joseph Michael Linsner. A friend sent the jpg to me not long after I got my computer because he knew I loved that kind of artwork. When I found out I could have my pick of backgrounds for my journal I didn't even hesitate. He's just so gorgeously scary!

Picking the background pic and saying 'I want the text in the middle' was my entire contribution to the layout. I have my own personal codemeister to do the fiddly stuff. She did the bloodclaim layout for me too. I <3 my Sofi. ;o)

Thanks again. :o)
Rosiethewatch on July 4th, 2004 07:49 pm (UTC)
This is really good, I think you've got the voices down very well, especillay Dru as she has a very hard voice to get.

Only tiny, little, teeniest niggle. Which just be totally me. It felt like you had a little too much dialogue for Dru, it was all good stuff and all sounded perfectly like her, but I don't imagine her going on for quite so long.

I love this fic though!!! Go the Jesse mourning.
darkhavensdarkhavens on July 4th, 2004 08:41 pm (UTC)
Dru was a little verbose, but I figure Spike had been gone for quite a while and she was excited at sensing Daddy so she rambled on a bit. And everything she said was relevant, if you see it thru Dru-coloured glasses. ;o)

I don't plan to let her do it too often though. Thanks for fbing!
beetle_beetle_ on January 11th, 2005 08:00 am (UTC)
"Have you brought me a present, my Spike? A pretty dolly to scream for me until the whispers stop? Is that why you've been gone so long?"


"Oh, my Spike, you've caught yourself a very special kitten. He's not for me at all, though his pain sings to me so prettily, my sweet boy. I smell innocence and grief and guilt and... Oh! Spike! I can smell Daddy!" Fingers hooked like claws reach out and grasp at Xander's arm. "I smell Daddy on you, Kitten. Did he send you here, a present for his bestest boy and girl?"


Perfecto! *giant, slobbery smackeroo, right on your forehead*

This evil, soulless demon that has taken control of his life, such as it is, obviously cares a great deal for the strange, exotic beauty he is catering to. Xander knows that she is damaged somehow, almost childlike; though he doubts her ability to kill is much impaired. And he wonders again what Jesse had felt when the stake slid through his flesh. Did he have time to think, to regret that it was Xander who was responsible for taking his life? Had his, their, life flashed before his eyes, or might that even have happened before, when he was turned? If he had survived the accidental staking, could he have shown the care and love this unfamiliar monster now displays?

The what-ifs are a bitch and Xander is a man of many what-ifs, poor guy.

"Your kitten's tearing tiny little holes into his soul, my Spike. I see them, full of dirty dark brown poison and they weep the purest blood-red rage and fury. He's a strong one, is your kitten, but he doesn't know his fate has been rewritten. Someone moved the picture, changed the clocks and made the moon go black. His coming here has altered all the truths I've seen so now I must see more."

Eeeee!!! She's talking about canon!!! Eeee!!!

Now I must see more!

"I could get used to cuddling up to you at night like this, so warm and cosy. You won't try and leave us while I sleep, now will you, pretty? Won't try to sneak out in the sunlight when you know that we can't follow? You'd best not try it, pretty, cos I'd hate to have to hurt you but I would. You're mine now, mine to keep and care for, hurt or harm. And you know it, deep inside you, where the pain is sharp as knives. So sleep now, and I'll chase away the nightmares that won't leave while you're awake."

Oh. . . pre-chip Spike. . . . *falls and falls hard*

And Xander sleeps, entangled in the limbs of something he'd been told to hate. And he sleeps well.

What a place to stop!

And -

What a place to stop. . . . *bows to the master*